Zen Living

Got this in an email. So worth sharing!

Zen Living

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

5. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

6. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

7. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

8. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

9. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

10. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

11. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

12. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.