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Today I've learnt that giving naseeha(advice) is alot easier giving than taking it.-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-
I've often mentioned how I love alfalah. I've never mentioned two of my favourite characters there. One is the Hurricane aunty and the other one's her counterpart - the milder, snowstorm aunty.
These two paki aunties come to the masjid for one month a year and bully the rest of us like anything. The snowstorm aunty gave me nightmares last year after i saw her screaming at one of the volunteers on eid day who was frying samosas for the mosque fundraiser. I thought she was the hurricane but ever since i've seen this new one, i think her intensity is more like that of a snowstorm.
The aunties at the masjid host iftar for one night in ramadan. the day before this night, they came into the masjid and cleaned out the mosque. they went into places, i would never dare going into and dug out all the mess. They even placed plants etc around the mosque. They definitely deserve kudos for it.
This iftar happened somewhere in the middle of Ramadan this year. Suddenly from the very next night, the moment you had food in your hand, they'd run to u and put plastic mats underneath your food. Now don't get me wrong, it's excellent that they took the initiative to do so... but there are manners to do so as well. Alfalah has a sisters prayer hall and a general area for kids etc. These aunties would kick you out from even there. The snowstorm aunty did most of this bullying.
Now comes the hurricane aunty. Picture this. isha prayers just got over, imaam just lead an awesome isha, with the most tranquil recitation ever. He now gives you a break to do sunnah. With the isha he just lead, you're really looking forward to the taraweeh with him. Break over. Imaam is now starting his taraweeh. He says 'Allahu akbar'. *wham* the door for the sisters hall opens and in walks in the hurricane aunty screaming away for sisters to fill in gaps. Lady, couldn't u do this before the iimaam said Allahu akbar? and do u neccessarly have to scream to do this? I kid you not, she literally bullies everyone in an extremely rude way.
Today, imo's cousin braced herself to politely pull hurricane aunty to the side and mention to her that what she does it not only rude, but very disturbing during prayers. She did this in a very polite way by pulling the lady to the side and everything. Moreover, B mentioned that hurricane aunty's volume is so loud, she can easily be heard in the men's section.
WHOOOOOAAAA! big mistake!
Poor B, she faced the hurricane onslaught. B is a very soft spoken girl whereas aunty hurricane is loud and aggressive. Aunty Hurricane got so loud, we all became so aware of what was going on. and since we all had the same problem with aunty hurricane, there was a LARGE group of women standing there and complaining to aunty hurricane abt the same thing. B explained very nicely, that imagine yourself being at the prophets time, would the prophet scream at the women the way you do? the prophet led by example, stand in a line and pull people closer! if there are gaps still, its not ur problem. the hurricane aunty turned it around and said: well when u guys talk, doesnt it bother others? we said, well thats your naseeha for us, we accept it - we wont talk. you should accept your naseeha. so the aunty raised her voice louder and started pointing fingers at B (i swear my heart was crying out for B!) and said, "i've been told by alot of ppl abt this, but gaps still remain, i've been doing it for 6 yrs, i will differ wth your argument and continue to do so". B apologized and said "i'm not trying to be rude but i think u represent me as a muslim and what you do is wrong, the prophet peace be upon him would never yell at his wives lke you do". the aunty goes "well the women never listen and i will correct them anyway" and walked off while venting to aunty storm..
here's my issue:
a: the imam announces for everyone to straighten their lines and eveyrone is supposed to follow, if they don't, it's their accountability.
b: both these aunties are part of a sisters tarbiyah program, if all they do is smell and yell, what do they learn in these classes if the youth have to correct them? even f you are not a die hard practicing muslim, these are basic human ettiquettes that are shared be humanity across the globe! but then this is a mosque, throw into the equation a religion of peace and love, a prophet of exemplary compassion - where does this behavour fit?
c: the hurricane aunty kept pointing fngers at B and kept yelling at her and kept dilating her eyes, as though she was talking to animals (and i swear to you, that's how she yells at people in the masjid!). *grr* what are they learning?
d: hurricane aunty kept admitting people have told her to stop before but she continues to do so because people arent learnng. HELLO! maybe your method isnt the best???
e: if you're happily bossing away ppl wth your naseeha, be ready to take it back too. if you're not happy with the way they stand, they're not happy with the way you yell. if you can give it, be ready to take it right back!
e: who has made her the officer-in-charge anyway??
